They say a picture paints a thousand words
my face is tainted white
behind it is a thousand hurts,
of all my wounds and fights
my smile is thrashed from left to right
in a dark and bloody red
permanently stained in an upward stance,
for all to see a fake happiness
Just clowning around
Just clowning around
I leap and dance for glee
acting upon the stage of life
such frivolity
I'm such a fool, I have no care
I seek for a 'peace' of sanity
to remove this mask
behind which I am such a fake
A tear rolls down my cheek
My makeup starts to run
Down the curtains roll!
Oh you lil' sad downtrodden clown
oh how pathetic and poor you look
where is your valour and victory now?
Is this your accomplishment, is this your feat?
I ride upon my tricycle
popping balloons and dishing out cards
begging you to take your pick,
A king of spades, A queen of hearts
and I ride on life's merry-go-round as if it were all so simplistic.
The children laugh, the children play,
I am but a child myself this day,
it is time for me to grow up they say.
I retreat to my stage room.
I close the door.
I peel off the make up and stare once more
at the face in the mirror staring back at me
and its a face I do not want to see
It's the face of a woman I cannot accept
she has the world at her feet
yet feels so incomplete,
she feels naked without the painted face
and inside her heart is sore and aches
she picks up her bag and combs her hair
tosses the clown's wig on the chair
'They will never know who I am'
'I can be exactly myself'
she thinks, smiles and grins
'Till tomorrow, my friends'
closes the door and out she sneaks...
Margaret Purslow
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/just-clowning-around/
