In a little family group they stood  
Aggrieved on the petshop floor.  
“It bit me and me mam and our Gladys,  
And ‘im, that boy by the door”.  
 
The ferret dangled like a dishcloth,  
Totally in disgrace  
And listened appalled as its sins and shortcomings  
Were paraded in front of its face.  
 
The petshop assistant was doubtful, and said  
They’d had it as a kitten,  
And neither customer or staff  
Had it ever bitten.  
 
But when she’d seen the scars and scratches  
On Gladys’s hands and face  
She said they might have another ferret  
To take the miscreant’s place.  
 
“No thanks, no way”, they said, as one,  
“We’ll have a different pet,  
Something soft, preferably toothless,  
Anything but a ferret”!  
 
They humm’d and haw’d and messed about  
With many a poke and dig  
And finally chose in exchange for their ferret  
A gormless guinea pig.
Pete Crowther
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/exchange-of-an-unsuitable-pet/