Everyone knows that proselytizers like you are fairly
robotic in their thinking and behavior. So if that’s the
case, why not be totally truthful about it and start
speaking in a robotic way when you meet people? Try
speaking in that monotone voice kids use when
they’re imitating robots - you know, with equal
emphasis on every syllable: You-must-hand-over-
your-soul-to-Je-sus-or-pay-the-con-se-quen-ces.” You
could even go “Beep” at the end of each sentence.
And when you’re trying to twist someone’s arm to
become a believer and they say they already lead a
happy and productive life, you can say, “That-does-
not-compute. Beep. That-does-not-compute.”
Professor Poetry Hound
http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/robotic/
