The East of England Ambulance Service Trust(EEAST) was called by a man complaining his feet hurt from too small shoes and a woman who ate too much take-away food.
Other ridiculous 999 calls included someone who got locked out of their house, a dog vomiting blood and someone who couldn't afford a taxi to hospital.
And two ambulance crews were turned around after being called to 'someone' who had been hit by a car in Epping Forest, Essex, when it turned out the patient was a SQUIRREL.
Bosses at the ambulance service, which has been criticised in Parliament after a number of patients died waiting for paramedics, have said unnecessary 999 calls affect response times.
The most bizarre calls made since January:
'Is it ok for a little squirrel to die?' - Caller tries to argue the case that an ambulance should have been sent to a squirrel in the Epping Forest area of Essex who had been the victim of a 'hit and run'. Two ambulance crews had been dispatched until it was established that the 'someone' was a squirrel.
'I've gone out shopping and locked myself out of my house.' - Shoeburyness, Essex, woman needing emergency locksmiths.
'My dog is vomiting blood' - woman in Wisbech, Cambs., calls 999 for a sick pet. She is advised to phone a veterinarian.
'I've eaten too much take-away food' – Chelmsford, Essex, woman feeling a bit sick after a day of indulgence.
'My feet hurt after wearing too small shoes' – Peterborough, Cambs., man needs an emergency cobbler.
'I've dropped my burger and it is bleeding' – Basildon, Essex, caller has take-away accident.
'I have been dieting and feel lethargic' – Hitchin, Herts., man's slimming efforts suffer a setback.
'I need to go to hospital and I don't get paid until tomorrow' – Benfleet, Essex, man calls 999 for a free taxi service.
